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Salt Of The Earth

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While discussing the recent socio-emotional learning boom with a colleague, Kellie Bhari (@Kbhari5), she called to my attention the fact that SEL is indeed salt. In French. Salt is a preservative. Salt is the basis of most seasoning mixes. Salt is essential, regulatory, nutritive, healing, did I say essential?

I won’t bore you with facts and figures, but the research says that students who have a sense of belonging do better in school than students who don’t. When a school is a place students–and teachers–want to be, everyone is less stressed, more content and better able to achieve. Students learn better from teachers they like. So, as much as I hate bandwagons, the SEL one is a bandwagon we should all be on.

I am warm and fuzzy– in a strict, pragmatic kind of way, an emotional hybrid who has always believed that the world could be a better place if we were to be kinder to one another. As a child I would come in crying, not because I was hurt, but because the kids were being mean to one another. I’ve never been much for “roasting” (“the dozens” for Gen Xers), fail videos, boxing or brutal talk and reality TV shows. I’m the person who rescues puppies, helps sick people in parking lots and goes to fish funerals when invited. I am also the person who navigates the social media waters without stirring the pot for discussion’s sake. I am the teacher who has always built on kindness as the foundation of class management and collaborative learning.

Helping students learn to manage emotions and work collaboratively makes magic in a classroom. When students are taught explicitly to check attitudes, mean-spiritedness and cliquishness at the door, it makes a difference. Quiet students learn to speak out. “Smart kids” build alliances with the “popular kids”. Churlish students find their smile. And everybody can risk failing up.

Maybe you are more of a content nerd ( a good thing, btw) or maybe your school has a schedule that doesn’t leave much time for “extras”. Maybe this is the first you’ve heard about kindness being a part of SEL or maybe you’d just like to know more. Randomactsofkindness.org has a host of resources that are easily integrated into an already full school day. If you’re the bucket filler, challenge your students to do one nice thing for someone else today. And join them. And if you are a go big or go home type, introduce SDGs, the UN’s 17 sustainable global goals, where you and your kids can spread kindness on a global scale. Whatever you do, find a way to add SEL components to your lessons and watch the change.

Yes, salt flavors everything. SEL, likewise, so while the pressure is on and you are gearing up for STAAR, don’t put away your SEL shaker. Send a positive note home, tattle about something good your colleague did, do something nice for yourself, your spouse or your “personal” kids. Sprinkle each day with a little extra kindness. Your students will be better for it, and so will the world.

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Celebrate

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On January 15th, Martin Luther King Jr. would have been 91 years old, had he not been shot and killed over 50 years ago. The father and husband had yet to celebrate his 40th birthday. A black man, shot and killed, riots destroying communities. A weapon bought under an alias days before the murder, an investigation lacking in clarity and closure. A story that could be in the news cycle today. His untimely death left a hole in the soul of this country. Given his work for equity and access during his short tenure on earth, he could not have imagined that 50 years on, we would still see the black man shot-riot-murky investigation scene played over and over at regular intervals. He would be deeply saddened to know that although Alabama and many other places find black children and white children playing together, school segregation is on the rise and in integrated schools, black students, particularly males, have a 25% suspension rate although they make up only 8% of the school population. He would be outraged that the guns that leave people maimed, dead and traumatized in churches and schools across America can still be bought in many states with few restrictions. What would he be doing to celebrate his birthday if he were alive and able today? Would he be sadly siting on the sidelines penning social media rants, or would he find some way to continue the work he started decades ago, work we say we celebrate on the 3rd Monday in January?

How are we celebrating the birthday of this man who lost his life fighting for equity and access for all? Are we shopping the sales? Sleeping in? Watching the parades and eating barbecue? While a day of rest is not a bad thing and saving money is always good, let me give you a few alternatives that would honor the man and his vision:

  • Use your voice. Go to your local city council and school board meetings to speak out and vote on social justice issues.
  • Register to vote. Or if you’re already registered, pick up cards from the library and get 5 friends to register. And have them do the same.
  • Volunteer at a school, library or community tutoring center. You don’t have to be an algebra wiz to help a 2nd grader.
  • Organize a driving pool in your church or community to drive voters to and from the polls on election days. Local ones are coming up.
  • Support organizations like the ones on this list or scan the UN’s SDG Lazy Person’s Guide To Saving The World to see what you can do while shopping to make the world a better place and honor the King legacy.

This holiday is about so much more than a birthday. It’s a reminder that the work Martin Luther King Jr. began is unfinished. In our classrooms, on our campuses, in our communities, there is work that needs to be done every day to ensure that all students have access to an equitable and culturally responsive educational experience. What and how we teach them will prepare them to then flood our communities with a deep and abiding sense of social justice and fairness.

Mommie and me

I remember my great-grandmother, Mommie, going proudly to eat lunch in the 70s at the Woolworth lunch counter, her cane tucked away, hatted head held even higher than usual. It would be years before I understood what this small privilege meant to a black woman born in Louisiana in the 1890s. I remember the 80s when Jessie Helms and other politicians tried to make sure that MLK’s birthday wouldn’t become a national holiday, and I remember the joyous celebrations when it finally did. Finally, I remember, only a couple of years ago, my son asking me if Obama had been the first black president. I remember being moved to tears, not because he had missed that fact, but because my son’s norm was having a black president. There has been progress. MLK forged a path in his short time as a civil rights leader that we have widened and fortified. But there is so much more to be done. I am moved to leave you with this poignant, action inspiring MLK Jr. quote;

“We are now faced with the fact that tomorrow is today. We are confronted with the fierce urgency of now. In this unfolding conundrum of life and history, there “is” such a thing as being too late. This is no time for apathy or complacency. This is a time for vigorous and positive action.”

–Martin Luther King Jr.

In honor of tomorrow’s holiday, how will you celebrate?

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I See You

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One evening, some silliness with a couple of teacher friends prompted me to Google an old series, The Beverly Hillbillies. Watching an episode transported me immediately back to my beloved childhood spot on the living room floor in front the TV. Like Jethro and Ellie Mae Clampett from the series, I grew up in an unconventional multi-generational household. The matriarch of our family was my great-grandmother, Mommie (pronounced with the second syllable stressed, in the Creole way), born in 1892. The matriarch of the Beverly Hillbillies was “Granny”. Although the show was an ensemble piece, Mommie seemed to only have eyes for Granny. Granny’s grey hair, her quick movements and her feisty wit rated Mommie’s commentary and wonder. At the time it was curious to me, but now that I am seeing my own Gen-X Hollywood A-listers relinquish their roles to the next generations, I understand why Mommie was so enamored with Granny. She saw in Granny a peer at a time in her life when her own peer group was dwindling. Ageism wasn’t even a word before 1969. There was no Netflix to push quality diverse programming and Norman Lear had not yet shaken up the sitcom scene. There were no Gracie and Frankies, no steamy Richard and Catherine love scenes and certainly no Morgan Freemans who kept getting hired “in spite of” being a minority and a senior. Mommie liked seeing Granny because she saw herself; and in seeing herself reflected on the Curtis Mathis TV screen, she felt un-invisible.

Thinking of how important Granny was to Mommie made me think of how important it is to be seen. EDU has responded to the need for inclusion and, although there are still “bubbles”, many educational settings have made strides in celebrating diversity and ensuring that students see themselves reflected in the staffs, literature and lessons on their campuses. Still, my question is, how are we defining diversity? In Hollywood it’s race, gender and age. In the classroom, we subtract age and add religion and socio-economic status. While these four cover a lot of ground, I’d like to challenge us all to go beyond those labels. How well are we validating and supporting students when the divergence is not apparent? Is there a quiet space at lunch for students who have social anxiety? Are there books to empower and encourage homeless kids or the students who run households? Are there qr codes and easily accessible resources posted for students struggling with depression and self-harm? Are our classes safe spaces for the kids with the “weird” hair or clothes who march to a different beat? Are we ourselves authentic and accepting so that students see themselves reflected in real life role models?

Beyond SEL and differentiation, how are you ensuring equity and access for all? Here is a challenge: have a weekly open door lunch and see who shows up. Get a couple of other teachers to do the same. A ‘lunch and hang’ will clue you in on who feels seen or who needs to be seen. It will give you a chance to learn about campus needs and trends you don’t know exist. You will find out about TikTok, games beyond Fortnite and Pubg, Creepypasta and who writes fan fiction. If your kiddos are younger, you will find out which cartoons are good, if wheelchair and ethnic hair Barbies really make the grade, and probably more about families than you want to know. You’ll find out who has lunch and who has hot Cheetos–or nothing at all. You will find out if your campus is a reflection of the students you serve and how you can serve better.

Mommie’s womance with Granny taught me the essence of what Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs taught me to name decades later; a sense of love, connection and belonging is essential. The questions I’ve asked here are the questions I ask myself daily. Am I really seeing my students? I can’t include what I don’t see so as an advocate for diversity and inclusion, I will be making sure to use my glasses more. Join me?

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A Little Help From My Friends

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As an only child of an only child of two only children, my biological family can feel a bit smallish at times. That ain’t stopped me none, however! I am blessed to have a warm and supportive framily across two continents, to whom I could not be closer. I inherited some of those relationships from my mom as she taught me the value of a village so it isn’t surprising that I am raising my own only in the same way. What is wonderful and surprising is that I find same Hānai theme in my professional life.

#crazyPLN

Through a series of coincidences–if you believe in such–I have come across some amazing educators. We share many commonalities, and yet, are diverse in a way that would cause riots to break out on Facebook. Not only do we check in and support each other professionally, we have #squadgoals and find ourself spreading our brand of crazy, impactful HeartWork beyond our campuses to educators around the world.

So what’s the point of all this, you’re asking? First, to throw out some gratitude during this season. Having a group of understanding educators to vent to spares our families countless hours of listening to school-day tales while their eyes glaze over (yes, we notice)! Beyond the expression of gratitude and appreciation, I would like to encourage educators to seek out strong professional relationships. Too often we find ourselves alone in our classes, over-salting salted caramel lattes with our tears after some MeanParent email. Education can be brutal without a village, but it doesn’t have to be that way. You may have to put yourself out there and be the change. How about getting to know a teacher you hardly know, or writing someone on your campus a note of praise? You could also try to find groups of educators on other campuses in your district who you can share resources with. Or find educators across the world to Mystery Skype with! And find hashtags on social media that ring true with whatever your thing is, be it #SDGs, #SEL, #6thgrade or something else. I guarantee you’ll find your edumates, people you can double joy and halve pain with. And until you do, pop into our chats on Saturday mornings 9AM CET. You will find a group of extraordinary teachers, leaders, bloggers, authors, and mostly, wonderful human beings who are crazy about impacting the world through education!

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I Am What I AM

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Every year sees it’s academic superstars, those students who are focused, organized and gifted at the nuts and bolts of learning in a classroom setting. There must have been something in the water in 2008 because I am seeing some phenomenal 11 year olds. I appreciate all of my kids for their own unique strengths, but these kids have my admiration for a different reason. I want to be them when I grow up. Of course, in my 14th year in education, I should consider myself a grown-up. And I’m pretty sure I am, in all of the important ways. But while I am darn good at adulting, I have not yet stopped aspiring to be more grown-up. I am the teacher who turns in lesson plans on time, keeps a (mostly) neat desk, and I could pass a gradebook check on any given day. But I was not born this way. Third grade me spent many minutes nose-in-corner for having forgotten something—again. Or for having a messy backpack—again. Or for losing a paper—again. Of course third grade me in today’s school system would have been given “paperwork”, an IEP, or a 504, and a cool nickname like 2e. But it was a different time. I was a gifted student but “absent-minded” and would have “lost my head if it wasn’t attached”, as I so often heard. Since we are always really just bigger, (hopefully) more capable versions of our 3rd grade selves, I look at my superstars in the room and see my own growth potential. When Amerie was asked how she managed to write in her planner and complete her warm-up consistently every day before most kids had even pulled out their pencils, her answer was simple. “I don’t entertain foolishness”. Drop mic. GEEZ, I want that focus!

My computer lab,
my student’s shiny backpack and edge gel!

Every morning, forty minutes before class begins, I park and say hello to the librarian as she and her daughter pull in. I can tell she was Amie when she was a kid. She moves towards the school while I wish the back of her head a nice day and rummage through the back seat to pick one of 5 pairs of shoes that will match my outfit AND not have me limping out of school today. I walk toward campus, stopping briefly to mention the climate action my 7th graders are working on to the campus officer who leaves his motor running the whole 45 minutes he’s there. Shaking my head, I start off again towards the school building. In the distance I see the librarian already entering the building as I hug my kid goodbye before he goes off to his side of campus. Then I stop to ask Ms. Willis something about Fall Festival because, well, sometimes a conversation is so much better than an email. On my way to the MS building once again, I stop quickly to remind a student that he needs to come to tutoring. Finally inside the building, with 25 minutes to go, I say hello to the Spanish teacher in my new Duo Lingo Spanish, and beam at her compliments about my current ability to use lifesaving phrases like El Español es muy divertido. While I’m there we share a concern about a student because, as you know, a conversation is so much better than an email. Once again I head toward my room but remember to stop in to the Special Education department to set up a meeting about something. It’ll only take a sec. While I’m there, I say hi to Dobby, the pet bearded dragon who smiles at me when he hears my voice. No really, he does. I head to my room while greeting another two teachers, but this time I keep it moving. Class starts in 18 minutes and I still have fairy lights, lamps and a slow computer-projector combo to boot up. I finally make it to my class, get everything turned on and wonder why I don’t have time to run to the powder room before class. And why my coffee is cold. And why I didn’t get to change the date on the board. I got here 40 minutes early, after all. I am obviously not Amerie. Or Ollie, Figgy or Denny or any of the 11 year old superstars I am privileged to teach. I remind myself, however, that who I am is who I’m meant to be, in all my imperfection. We teachers sometimes forget that our schools don’t need perfect teachers, just teachers perfectly willing and ready to inspire learning.

If you know teachers who have forgotten this important truth, tag them and remind them.

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Dance With My Father

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An open letter peppered with football metaphors

Single motherhood is the only game I know in which you get booed for running someone else’s fumble into the end zone. Ball recovery is usually the stuff that makes MVPs, wins full rides and goes viral in compilation videos. So where is our cheering crowd?

Chris In Earl Campbell’s Number

As I walked out on this morning’s sermon that began with that old familiar tune about single mothers being unfit to raise boys, I realized that, had a preacher begun with “only a white man can govern society”, there would have been folks walking out right along with me. Sadly, I think I was the only person who noticed something was horribly wrong.

Basically if “only a man can raise a man”, then only a ball carrier can carry a ball, right? New England’s Kyle van Noy should have been lambasted for last season’s scoop and score against the Jets, right? Instead, the crowd went wild, as it should be with a fumble recovery. 

I want to be a Single Mother Head of Household Raising Children Alone…said almost no one ever. And men probably don’t start out to leave women to raise their children alone–but they do. In African-American households like mine, almost half of us are quarterbacking our boys to manhood, often with the defensive line sitting the bench. According to Pew and the Census Bureau, dads (and occasionally moms too) owed a whopping 33.7 billion in child support. That puts many single moms at our own 10-yard-line with poverty, dropping out, unemployment and drug use threatening to tackle us before we even hit the 50. Still, even deep in enemy territory, we play hard. And, despite what the old research says, recent data says we are making our way toward the goal line (insert crowd-goes-wild cheering here).

For folks not quite getting this, it’s all good. We don’t always get the home game crowd. But do me one favor? Next time you flag a single mom for picking up a fumble and running with it, check your jersey. If it ain’t black and white striped, be a fan and just cheer, because when the ball is fumbled, you pick it up and run. That’s what you do. And in spite of archaic, nay-saying rhetoric, women are winning the game, raising successful men every day.

Bobby D. Porché
My BFFs dad, prior to his death in 2017

While I have not had the luxury of an earthly father, I have known great men who have loved and protected their families, me included. I honor them and am thankful for the vision of fatherhood they have given me. Today, I also want to give a crowd-goes-wild cheer to women raising men on their own. Mommas, let that roar be the background music of every successful play that you end-zone-dance to. Finally, if you happen to know one of those single mother MVPs, give her a shout-out. Like #metoo, it helps to know someone else gets it. #SingleMomsRock

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Summertime

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Whether the title calls to mind Gershwin’s Summertime, Will Smith’s anthem or Mungo Jerry’s 1970 hit that has more lives than a cat, thanks to Shaggy and the Minions, fact is, “school is out and it’s sort of a buzz”!

Unplugged on vacation–just do it.

If you are not a teacher, you probably imagine us educators at the pool every day with our kids. While hopefully, most of us do take advantage of having less structure, what we’re probably doing is attending conferences, cleaning out files and spending countless hours on our computers learning new skills and strategies in order to become better educators. My personal faves are research and strategies from Edutopia, podcasts from Cult of Pedagogy unconference swag from ISTE and Google trainings from Kasey Bell, which I am sending out to my student tech staff to prevent summer brain drain.

The beauty of this time is that, it gives me time to reflect and dream of how I can bring more to the table for future generations. It’s that space that gives me impetus for innovation and lets me critically look at what worked last year, what didn’t, and what I can do to better facilitate inquiry and learning. Even in my 13th year, I am still looking for ways to bathe in cutting edge bathwater while not throwing out the sound-teaching baby, which will always involve building relationships, and helping littles and young people grow their passion for learning.

Happy summer teachers! Practice self-care and spend time doing things you love–like shopping on Teachers Pay Teachers, registering for Instagram giveaways and filling up your Pinterest and Twitter feeds with stuff you want to add to your lesson plans next year. And don’t sweat any of the “you don’t work in summer” shade. Working or not, school is out and it really is a buzz!!

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Red Yellow Black And White

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“All are precious in His sight”

For the MLK holiday weekend, I was invited to see my friend’s daughter in a step show. I eagerly looked forward to it, as visions of 80s Greek picnics danced in my head. The raw energy and sensuality of alpha males and females stomping on the yard was coming to a venue near me! Never mind that these were K-12 kids coming to honor and celebrate MLK. Never mind that this was a school function. Never mind that as a teacher, somewhere in the recesses of my mind, I’m sure I had a clear picture of the scope and sequence of the performance expectations. In my mind, this step show was going to superimpose itself onto my memories and transport me back to my college days.  For me, that time was after fireside chats and long before anyone dreamt that someone who looked like Barack Obama would become #44. MLK day had yet to be celebrated as a holiday and #metoo was only expressed in silent tears. The phrases “white privilege” and “implicit bias” had yet to coined, as had “growth mindset” and “every child can learn”. Fortunately, society–and classrooms– have seen some changes.


Turns out, step show culture has seen some changes as well. My memories scooched over and made room for golden character shoes, diverse cultural and gender backgrounds, canned music,  dramatic interpretation, and well designed sets and backdrops. 


Fireside chats were a minute ago, so many of these things may already be the norm. And while I won’t go into what year found me at my last step show, I will go into bias: Any time a memory has to “make room” for a new or changing status quo, the weeds of rose colored bias probably still need to be rooted out. 


As I sat and gleefully applauded the hard work and amazing craftsmanship of each team,  I kept thinking, “Oh, I don’t remember that, that’s new”, which means, somehow, I was judge, not just spectator. I enjoyed the show immensely. My own part, however, left me a bit perturbed, and, if I am honest, disappointed. I am inclusive, open-minded, grounded in my own beliefs but stopping WAY short of insisting that others live by them. I am really inclusive… right? Or does my traditional Christian upbringing make me more judgmental? Does my African-American cultural background make me too quick to see cultural appropriation? Does my status as a cisgender, Gen X female give me an unshakeable world view? Finally and more importantly, if and when I find biases, do I strive to stomp them out so that I can greet all of my students–all people–with acceptance and human kindness? 


If you have not asked yourself any of these questions, you probably have some unearthed bias to deal with. Not sure? Harvard’s Implicit Bias Project is a great place to start. The “white privilege” mindset is not reserved for whites only. We all learn perspective and bias, it’s human and normal. Perspective has its place, bias does not. We should challenge ourselves to move beyond it, and as educators, it is imperative that we do. 


It turns out that I liked gold character shoes, the poetic odes and skits, and all the other shiny new spins I saw. The essence was there, and the MLK holiday step show did remind me of my own time on the yard, back in the day. More importantly, it reminded me that I, like this country, have come along way, but still have a long way to go.

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Teach Your Children Well II

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Credit TPHFW Instagram

This has been a stellar year for teaching the children well. In addition to joining the staff of an IB school immediately after my graduation from Texas A&M, I watched my “personal kid” (teacherspeak for the ones in your home vs. the ones in your class) grow into a professional bassist. After playing a gig with me in at the Lihn in Switzerland, I watched this young man develop relationships and talent at both UTA Sumer Strings and UTA Jazz Camp. After subbing in various settings in the FDW area, he has now put these talents to use in the youth service at The Potters House Ft. Worth as part of the Firehouse band. That makes my son the FIFTH generation church staff musician. Additionally, this past Sunday, he helped at the voters registration table while I registered to become a voter registrar. Voting is something he can’t do yet, but he’s already doing his part (btw, you can register using that link in 37 states, plus DC). I am teaching my children well. I am raising a child who works for what he believes in. That is a fine legacy, and I couldn’t be prouder.

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Teach Your Children Well

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There are many reasons to teach. Some teachers love content. That’s teacherspeak for the subject matter. When you love history and math, teaching is a great option. Some teachers extend their parenting time by helping to shape the lives of other children. Some of us do it because of the excellent pay,  lack of bureaucracy and the endless opportunity for professional development. Ok, probably not that. But maybe there will even be a flood of new teachers who join this noble profession for the free weapons and tactical trainings coming to a school near you. Whatever the reasons, almost all of us live for those moments when we know we’ve made a difference in a student’s life. That email (from a fellow teacher, no less!) letting me know that her son finally loved to come to school, never had so many friends and feels “seen”, was one of those moments. Feeling warm and fuzzy now? I am. 

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